Acceptance

Teenagers... I don't understand us. I don't think anyone ever will. We are so emotional, so down, and so mean. We long so much to be accepted, to be wanted, so we will be rude to each other just to get that. And most people that are accepted as teenagers end up being janitors for a crappy school. So why do we long for acceptance? I'm guilty of it. Non-Christian people use sex to feel accepted, but of course that ends in more pain and worthlessness feelings. Christian people should long after God's acceptance. So many times we put having friends and being popular in front of God and God's will for our lives. I struggle with the way I look. Someone called me ugly and fat a few times the other day. I was hurt because I want to look nice in by the world's standards. I put trying to look cute in front of everyone in front of everything sometimes. It sucks, I know. It only ends in hurt and sadness because I know I will never be beautiful in the world's eyes, but I can be beautiful in the eyes of God. I am. He created me to be exactly how he wants me to be- every freckle, every hair, and every inch of height that I am so conscious about. A guy told me yesterday that he likes the girls that are pretty, so he would never like me. I pretended like it didn't hurt, but obviously it did. But why? God made me just how he wants. He made me to look exactly how I do. He wanted me to be heavy and he wanted me to be tall (at least this time in my life). He wanted me to have big feet and poofy hair. I need to learn to be ok with this. A chapel speaker talked about this today. He was saying how God made us for a purpose. I may not know it yet, but it's coming. God promises. I trust him! So I will never understand us, but while I have to be one, I will have to accept being a teenager.