Living a Godly life?

Life has been good these past few days. I've been pretty joyfull. Feeling close to God. Today I got a little discouraged, though. Jill was talking about her friend saying how she didn't like the song "Mr. Brightside" because it was against the Bible. She was saying how her firend was really "into the Bible and Jesus and stuff" and I said that I was too and Jill was like "no, not like this." After work I started crying. I feel like a failure! I'm trying to be a good example at work and at school where a majority of my class is not saved, but at the same time I want to fit in. I want people to know I'm a Christian through my example and respect that I am a Christian. I have to wonder, am I completely failing as a follower of Christ?

I honestly thought that people were beginning to look past my repulsive outerlooks and see my personality, but apparently that will never happen. Apparetly ugly people deserve to be told so. We need people to give us that daily reminder that we are fat because somehow we didn't know before. We need people to tell us that we are ugly because we don't realize that fact every single time we walk past a mirror! Thanks for the reminder. But I seriously thought that people could look past me being ugly and see "me for me." Maybe people are looking past my looks and seeing my horrible personality. Maybe my "inside" is just as repulsive as my "outside," so people have a right. Yeah, that's gotta be it. Maybe I can change. Become someone else. Yeah, real good, Kathryn. Way to be Biblical.
I hate it, absolutly hate it, when people feel that they need to critique everyone about everything, especially to people who have similar qualities to the person they were just judging. People who aren't stylish. Someone was saying that she hates people who aren't stylish. Someone else at lunch on Monday said they hate fat people. Another person said they don't like people who are not athletic. And they said this all to me! I could go on and on about that sorta stuff in just this past month! One of my teachers told me that if I went to a public school I would be put in 5th grade level classes. Thanks for the ecouragement, guys. My self-steem was getting so high, it's a good thing that you came along to put it back down. I don't know what I would do without you.

Family Weekend rocks my socks!

Yeah, GVSU family weekend was fun! On Friday I hung out with Sarah and Sean, and then Benjamin and I went to Kliner late night. Saturday Sarah and I got up real early to take pictures of Sean getting his boat ready for him rowing meet. We saw Hamlet which was really long. My butt was numb, and I'm sure you really needed to know that. We went to the Lakers game vrs. Wayne State and won (of course). Got to hang out with Benjamin and watch Will Farrel and the very end of Ladder 49 with Sarah and Sean and cried! People kept asking me if I was a student. It was funny.
So...Work. McDonald's. It's fun sometimes, but it's pretty hard not to get sucked into a not-so-good lifestyle while I'm there. A lot of people come in and talks about there partying and stuff and there alcohol or about there experiences with boyfriends and what-not. It's so hard not to get caught up in that. Especially with swearing and taking God's name in vain. I don't personally think swearing is sinful (I'm not sure though), but I do think taking God's name in vain is sinful because it says so plain as day in the Bible. It's hard not to gossip too! Lots of people talk to me about how they don't like someone or another, and it's SO hard not to join in. Usually I just say "yeah" or whatever. I just pray that God will be in me when I go to work so that I can not only keep myself innocent but be a good example also. A lot of the people at work don't have any Christian influences. I don't want to put myself up or anything because I am no better than anyone at work.
God, help me keep myself clean minded and Christian-like please!