Mexico instalment #1

Wow......... There are never enough accurate words to describe a mission trip. My mind can never wrap around the experience. I don't even think it ever fully sinks-in. The trip was so full of emotions! Joy, love, dislike, happiness, sadness, confusion, hurt, forgiveness....... Everything! Wow, that makes the trip sound like it wasn't good. It wasn't like that at all! Let me explain... With 10 people together for 10 days, there will be emotions! It's a fact. For the most part I think we got along alright. There were some times when a few people got on my nerves, but it wasn't like I wanted to kill anyone..... Ok, well, it wasn't like I wanted to kill anyone very often. There was one kid who kept making comments about my size without really even thinking about it. (he keeps bringing it up now too.... ugh!)I felt mostly like I wasn't being helpful enough. I keep thinking that I didn't do enough for the group. Some people were complaining about people that didn't work hard, and when I wasn't around, my name was probably mentioned too. I was also probly mentioned with the annoying list people. I feel like I bothered everyone a lot. I feel like I was too immature. At the very beginning of the trip, I wished I hadn't gone because it hit me somewhere on the 31 hour van ride that I was too young. Everyone else was 20's, 30's, and 40's and I'm 16. I was afraid that people were going to exclude me because of my age. But that's not how it turned out, thank God! I was included! It felt so good to be included. You have not idea. Thanks everyone! I still can't shake the feeling that I bothered everyone. I wish I knew, so I didn't have to wonder. But at least most people at least pretended to like me. I felt so welcome! So loved!
My, oh my, how I miss everyone. Well, almost everyone...... When you're stuck with people for 10 days, they become like family for those 10 days. I know it sounds corny, but hey, it's true. After coming home I started bawling!!! I didn't want to be home. I was tired and cranky and my mom was yelling at me and I just wanted to go back to Mexico. I miss the kids, I miss Chila, I miss Juan and Lisha, I miss the group that went.